Evicted
by Anathema Lovers
Summary: Yuki and Shuichi get evicted from their apartment, and are forced to move out. One shot. Yuki & Shuichi.


**Evicted.**

"Yuki, I'm hooooooome!" Shuichi sang out as he walked through the apartment door and toed off his shoes. Shuichi listened intently in case there was a reply, but he knew better than to expect one.

"Yuuuuuki!" the pink haired boy sing-songed, searching through the apartment for his lover. The most obvious place was the study, but the door was wide open and revealed no Yuki to be there. The next most obvious place was the bedroom, but poor Shuichi found as soon as he pushed open the closed door, it was slammed back into his face.

The petit boy fell to the ground with a 'thump!' and whined at the closed door. "Yuki! That was so mean! It's my bedroom, too. Yuki! Why can't I come in? Yuki, Yuki, Yuki!"

The door was opened again, and Shuichi's near-tearing eyes looked up hopefully. There was Yuki, hair wet and a towel around his neck, but his chest bare. He wore pants, but they looked hastily put on as if… Shuichi had almost walked in on him changing. Oh.

"Yuki!" Shuichi launched himself into a hug, but with well-practiced maneuvers, Yuki stepped out of the way and silently walked to the kitchen while Shuichi found himself knocking against a wooden door frame.

"Wahhhh, Yuki!" the boy cried out, but the tall blonde writer ignored him in favor of a cold beer from the fridge. "That was so mean, you're so mean today! Why are you so grumpy-grumpy?! Did I do—"

"Pack your shit."

"Huh?" Shuichi stared at Yuki, confusion filling his features.

"Pack your shit, stupid." The blonde was leaning absently against their kitchen counter, holding a beer in one hand and rubbing his still-wet hair with a towel.

Shuichi immediately feared the worse. "Oh, Yuki! Don't kick me out again! What did I do? Don't be mean, Yuki! Meanie! Yuuuuuuki!" It was obvious the pink-haired boy would go on longer, had Yuki's towel not been thrown in his face. Despite the threat of being kicked out, Shuichi took the time to sniff admiringly at Yuki's scent. He smelled strong and musky like a man and Shuichi… Well, Shuichi smelled like strawberries and pocky most of the time.

"Huh?" Shu looked up, realizing Yuki had spoken (and he hadn't been paying attention!), and held the towel tightly in his hands.

"I said you're an imbecile." Yuki had finished his beer and tossed the can carelessly on the floor, where normally he would have thrown it away. If Shuichi had even thrown garbage on the floor, there was no doubt Yuki would yell at him, and suddenly Yuki was throwing trash all over the place? Shuichi was confused.

"I've been evicted. Apparently, the neighbors upstairs don't particularly enjoy your screaming during sex."

Shuichi blushed, but he was happy, nevertheless, that he wasn't being kicked out. Well, he was being kicked out, but Yuki was, too, and that made it better. And suddenly, the boy starting tearing up again, so Yuki groaned and walked away to the study.

"B-b-b-but, Yuki! Where are we going to live?! I'm too young to be thrown out on the street! I don't want to be a prostitute!" Yuki ignored the singer until his last line. With a smirk, Yuki sat at his desk and glanced over at Shuichi, who had, of course, followed him into the study.

"You're already a prostitute."

"Wha-wha-what?!" Shuichi screamed, looking at Yuki with a surprised look across his face.

"You're a pop star who sells his body to thousands of teenaged girls. You think they go to your concerts for shitty lyrics and out of tune singing?"

The insults completely passed over Shuichi's head as he stared at Yuki with adoration. "Oh, Yuki! You think I'm a pop star?!"

The blonde novelist turned away in agitation. Stupid pink-haired prostitute, only hears what he wants to.

"We're leaving tomorrow afternoon." The blonde interrupted before Shuichi could say anything about his reference to him as a pop star. "So get your shit together, or I'm leaving your ass here."

Shuichi smiled and ran out of the room, a blur of pink hair, yellow tank top, and baggy blue shorts. Yuki sighed and opened his laptop, relieved the singer had gone away so he could make a few corrections on his—

"Hey, Yuki!" Shuichi was already back in the room, a handful of obnoxiously bright clothing in his arms.

The blonde ignored him and clicked away at his computer, looking for the right chapter of the novel so he could just change…

"YUKI!" Shuichi was in front of him, smiling idiotically and dropping clothes all over the floor. "Where are going? We have someplace else to go, right? We could go to Hiro's! Or my parents! I'm sure they wouldn't mind me coming home, especially not if I brought you, too. They really like—"

"I bought a house a few streets down." Yuki hoped by answering him, and ignoring him, he'd finally get back to his lap top, but to the blonde's irritation, Shuichi was hopping up and down, even more of the clothes in his arms falling away.

"A house, Yuki?! Like, a real house?! For us?! A _family_ house?! Oh, Yuki! Yuki, I'm so happy!" Shuichi dropped all of his mismatched and odd clothing to jump at Yuki, hugging him tightly around the neck and refusing to let go.

"Don't get the wrong idea, brat. A house means more space I have to hide from you."

"Oh Yuki," Shuchi sighed, happily purring against his lover's shoulder. "You could never hide from me."

With some dismay, Yuki realized this might just be true.

**Finding Home.**

Though not fully moved in, Yuki was happy that at least the couch was in place, so he could sit down to rest. The blonde had gotten no sleep the last night, with trying to push Shuichi away, make a few changes in his novel, and more importantly, push Shuichi away. Yuki had been so fed up with Shuichi's constant talking about having a house that Yuki did the only thing he knew that could shut a person up.

Naturally, it started with a few softly placed kisses, followed later by a few rough fucks in the bed. Shuichi had fallen asleep afterward, and Yuki was left in peace to make those last minute revisions. What he didn't account on, though, was falling asleep at his desk in the early hours of the morning, and waking up to Shuichi screaming "Oh god, I'm late! K's going to shoot me!"

It had not been a good start to the morning. It wasn't until 2 hours later, a cup of coffee and a beer later that he realized that Shuichi had fallen asleep after the sex, instead of _packing_. The blonde had growled, and was tempted to just leave the singer's stuff there, but he **really** didn't want to put up with his nagging tonight.

So not only did Yuki have to pack his own things, the appliances, the furniture and everything else in that god damned apartment, but also Shuichi's shit. Fuck.

Now Yuki sat on the couch, too tired to really be pissed off, after having yelled at those incompetent movers for just dumping all of his belonging in the living room and leaving. Didn't he pay them so _he_ wouldn't have to move the bed and dresser into the bedroom, and that heavy wood desk into the room that would be his study? He was sure he did, and yet, they did nothing.

The blonde was aching and tired and there were still boxes all over the floor and it really was just too much work for someone who smoked as much as he did. Thinking of smoke, Yuki lifted his head to look for his cigarettes, only to find they were on the other side of the room. Fuck. Oh well. He'd get up later. Yuki fell asleep as he was, sprawled across the couch with one arm covering his eyes and a foot falling off the edge.

"Wahhhhh! Yuki! Where are you?!" Shuichi had come home after a day of recording only to find the apartment empty, and that bastard Yuki hadn't even left a note with the new address. Shuichi had cried, not so much at the thoughtlessness of Yuki but at how empty the aprartment looked and how much it reminded him of when Yuki had left him.

"Yuuuuki! You're not getting away from me that easily!" Shuichi, with new determination not to be left behind, ran out the door and to the nearest house, ringing the doorbell repeatedly. A middle aged man answered the door, looking quite peeved, but Shuichi ignored him.

"Sorry, wrong house!" Shuichi ran away only to stop at the next house, and do the same thing. He repeated himself for several hours.

Yuki woke up with a startle as someone was ringing the doorbell, and Yuki groaned. Surely, it was not some overly obnoxious neighbors to give him food? It couldn't be any family, he'd made sure not to tell anyone the address. That left…

Shuichi. Oh, crap. Yuki stood up and unlocked the front door, and sure enough, Shuichi launched himself at the blonde as soon as he opened the door.

"Yuki, you bastard! Why didn't you call me?! I've been to every house in the area! You're so mean, leaving me like that and moving all by yourself! Yuuuuki!" Shuichi yelled at his lover, but the novelist seemed to take no notice, only shutting the door and locking it once more. He was way too tired to deal with this.

"Just shut it, brat." Yuki sighed, his voice losing any real conviction. With Shuichi still firmly hugging his body, Yuki picked the slim singer up and carried him under his arm into the bedroom. If Shuichi happened to hit a few boxes and doorways while Yuki walked… Oh well.

By the time they reached the bedroom, Shuichi was tearing up and telling Yuki how mean he was to lock him out of the house, and then drag him through it and knock him into everything on the way, while Yuki was still pretty much oblivious to it all as he collapsed into the bed, not even bothering to get under the covers before falling asleep. Shuichi was still trapped under Yuki's arm, but the pink haired singer felt much calmer than he did a few seconds ago. Yuki looked so tired…

A few minutes later, Shuichi and Yuki were under the blankets of their bed, warm and… well, naked. Shuichi giggled at having gotten to undress Yuki and curled up next to the blonde with a smile on his face. Shuichi, too, started to fall asleep, but he wondered absently if he should get up, if for nothing better than to take pictures of Yuki naked and sleeping, and blackmailing him. Another time, perhaps.

**Like A Big Piggy Bank**

Being Sunday, and a day off for everyone, Shuichi was free to sleep in however late he wanted. If only he would, Yuki thought angrily as he woke up to the sound of Shuichi singing, and odd burning smells coming from the kitchen. Yuki groaned and smothered himself with a pillow. He didn't want to get up, didn't want to have to go out there and see what Shuichi was doing to his brand new kitchen.

But Shuichi was smarter than he looked, Yuki knew, because every morning Shuichi would find Yuki's cigarettes and keep them in his pocket, so Yuki had no choice but to find the pink haired singer and get them back. Fucking brat. Yuki stumbled out of bed and moved towards the door only to realize he was naked. He growled while pulling on the pants he had worn yesterday. Had that brat been having fun while he was asleep? Yuki paled at the idea, of what Shuichi would do to him if he had fallen into a dead sleep. But he looked in the mirror, and saw no hickeys, or magic marker all over him, so he sighed, and went to find Shuichi. Or more importantly, his cigarettes.

He found Shuichi in the kitchen, still singing, seemingly oblivious to the fact that while, yes, he was making pancakes, they were all blackened, and few looked positively crispy. Right next to Shuichi were his cigarettes, and before Shuichi could take them hostage and demand a kiss in exchange, Yuki grabbed them a walked away, the singer yelling a "Hey, Yuki!" after him. He didn't care, though. A cigarette, a cup of coffee, and a shower (in that order) was all he wanted at the moment.

By noon, Yuki had finished coffee and shower, and now looked around the living room with a calm eye. While Yuki had been grumbling and drinking and smoking and showering, it seems Shuichi had taken it onto himself to unpack. Yuki would like to say that stupid singer did a terrible job, and give him something to make fun of, but overall, Shuichi didn't fuck anything up. The few pieces of furniture they had was arranged oddly, trying to take up more space in a room that was much too big for what little they had. More furniture would fix that.

In the bedroom, Shuichi had hung up all their clothes, in the same closet, but at least he had separated their clothing into two sections. The right side was Yuki's, and the left was Shuichi's. Everything was eerily in place. How the hell had Shuichi managed to do this?

Yuki walked over to his dresser, and all his clothing was neatly in the top drawers, and Shuichi's in the bottom. On top were a few pictures, mostly of Shuichi, and a rather ugly pink piggy bank. Why the fuck did Shuichi still have one of these? Yuki picked the small pig up, but, surprised by its weight, dropped it.

In the second that the pig smashes, Yuki found himself engulfed in money. The blonde, stunned into silence, closed his eyes, but the distinct smell and fell of money was all around him. What the fuck? When he opened his eyes, their entire bedroom was covered in bills. At his feet alone, there must have been a few thousands dollars, and that had been spread across a rather large room. How the hell had that much money even fit into a pig that small? What the fuck was Shuichi doing with so much cash?

At that moment, Shuichi walked into the room, hearing the sound of a crash. "Wahhh! Yuki! All my money!" Indeed, all of Shuichi's money was spread across the room, mostly bills of 100s, with a few 50s and 20s here and there. "Now I'm going to have to go buy a new piggy bank!"

Yuki, for once, had no idea what to say. There must have been hundreds of thousands of dollars littering the room… and it had all fit inside one little piggy bank. This defied every science class he had taken in high school.

"What the fuck is all this?" Yuki glared at Shuichi. Who had this much cash on them? "Haven't you ever heard of a bank, you freak?" Shuichi pointed an accusing finger at Yuki.

"You just broke my bank! You're so mean, Yuki!" Shuichi started to cry, all the while trying to pick up the many bills that littered the floor. He muttered stupid, and bastard, and mean, all while picking them up, shooting teary glares at Yuki.

"Shuichi, don't you have a bank account? A _real_ one?" The novelist asked, realizing that as stupid as he thought Shuichi to be, the boy might just be down right retarded.

"I did until you went and broke it, Yuki! Meanie!" Yuki groaned and fell onto his money-covered bed.

"Shuichi. A _real_ bank is a building that will hold your money, with people that work there." Yuki did his bed to describe it in such simple terms, but a smirk tugged at his lips as he stared at Shuichi. What an incompetent little brat. No wonder he was a pop star, he was obviously too stupid to do anything else.

"So, it's like a big piggy bank."

"Yeah, something like that."

A week later found Shuichi to be _the_ happiest man on the earth. So yeah, Yuki had broken his bank, but now…

"Look, Hiro! See! Do you see it?! So Yuki put all my money in his account, and changed it, and now look! We have these cards that have our names on them _together_ and I got this checkbook and I got to put kittens in the background and look, Hiro, look! Our names! Our names are _together_! Isn't it great, Hiro, Yuki and I are sharing a big piggy bank! First we got a house and now a piggy bank! Oh, Hiro, I'm so happy!"

Shuichi started to cry, clutching his new bank card and checkbook tightly to his chest. It didn't matter if he didn't know how to use either of them, so much as—

"Ah! K! Have you seen my checkbook?! Me and Yuki's name are on them _together_!"


End file.
